Come and Take It, Darth Vader: New Design + Freedom of Speech Quotes

“There is freedom of speech, but I cannot guarantee freedom after speech.” – Idi Amin

Listen: A blog post isn’t going to change anyone’s mind about free speech. Freedom of speech quotes, however expertly they may have been curated, are not poised to make some pink-haired, nose-pierced, garishly-tattooed liberal arts student put down their hashtag pitchfork and reconsider whether they’re actually doing good by demanding the public crucifixion of anyone whose point of view falls right of Mao Zedong’s.

“Hate speech isn’t free speech.” This axiom, whenever it is bleated, should make any rational person’s skin crawl. It supposes that speech can be classified as acceptable or unacceptable and that someone has the duty to suppress the latter class.

No one has, and no one ought to. Perhaps in a perfect world, there could exist a ruling body that genuinely keeps its people’s best interests in mind when it bans the expression of objectively hideous sentiments. But this ain’t no perfect world, babe. If you’ve ever stepped on a wet patch of floor right after you put on fresh socks, then you have to know it.

The second you create authority, only authoritarians will allow themselves to have it. Let them control what you’re able to say, and the second it gives them an advantage they’ll slam the Overton window shut so hard it’ll cut off your fingertips. Justify restricting speech to protect the oppressed until you’ve run out of breath; it won’t change the fact that the oppressed are never the ones who control what others are allowed to say.

“Allowed to say!” We shouldn’t even be allowed to say such words. No one really gives a rat’s patoot what anyone has to say, anyway. It’s what they’re able to think that counts, and that’s the absolute devilry behind all of it. What your enemies really want is to control your thoughts. Removing your tongue is just outpatient lobotomy.

Freedom of Speech Quotes That Beg Repeating

“Reason and free inquiry are the only effectual agents against error.” – Thomas Jefferson
“If we don’t believe in freedom of expression for people we despise, we don’t believe in it at all.” – Noam Chomsky
“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.” – George Orwell

NEW DESIGN: COME AND TAKE IT, DARTH VADER

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Oh my God – gun nuts are so delusional if they honestly think they stand a chance of rebelling against the U.S. government. Have you ever heard of nukes? Yeah – the government would totally nuke its own cities in order to force people to keep going to work and paying taxes. Plus the million or so active-duty members of the U.S. Armed Forces would all unquestioningly lend their full enthusiasm toward the government’s efforts to terrorize and kill its own citizens.

But dude, have you seen Star Wars? It’s a series of movies about a ragtag group of rebels that stands up to a massive tyrannical empire using nothing but their weaponry and their resolve to be free! It’s a good thing giant weapons of mass destruction weren’t enough to deter the rebels against defying an evil regime.

There’s even one character who abandons his role as a stormtrooper so he can join the rebels’ good fight! Isn’t it convenient that I can only draw parallels between fiction and reality when they support whichever leftist talking points the media has ingrained in my head?

On an unrelated note, the prop for Han Solo’s heavy blaster pistol is actually a modified Mauser C96. Historic firearm dealers take extreme caution against selling those handguns to anyone they suspect of being a Star Wars enthusiast. If you ever do try to purchase a Mauser C96, begin the conversation with the dealer by telling him to live long and prosper.