Look Out Flu Shot Resistors: You Might Be Labeled a “FLUgitive”

This is from the “Believe-It-or-Not-This-Isn’t-Satire” files.

If you don’t get lined up for this year’s lethal injection – ahem – I mean flu shot – you just might get a push from a well-meaning (but brainwashed) friend or neighbor. A national campaign has begun with the intention to shame and peer pressure everyone to get the flu shot.

The campaign was created by Sanofi-Pasteur, the company who makes…you guessed it…a flu vaccine called Fluzone, approved by our good friends at the FDA in 2011. (They also collaborate with the notable eugenicists of the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation.) You can find out more about the FLUgitive campaign on Facebook.

#FLUgitives live in every town in America; they could be hiding in your workplace, your gym, the grocery store, or even in your own home. Each year in the U.S., 1 in 5 people, or up to 20 percent of the population, gets the flu and an estimated 226,000 people are hospitalized from influenza-related complications. But since the single most important thing adults can do to help prevent spreading the flu is to get their annual flu vaccination, these #FLUgitives should not wait. #FLUgitives are encouraged to come out of hiding, round up other #FLUgitives and turn themselves in to their healthcare provider to learn about the seriousness of influenza and their available vaccine options. 

“Because flu season can begin as early as October and last through May, the best prevention for those planning to get their annual flu shot is to get it as early as possible in the season, allowing your body time to build up its immunity,” said Carlos E. Picone, M.D., F.C.C.P., Vice-Chair of the Department of Internal Medicine at Sibley Memorial Hospital in Washington, D.C. 

Research has shown that social influences are a primary factor in the adoption of health behaviors. The FLUgitives campaign leverages the positive power of social peer influence to drive more people to help protect themselves against the flu by getting vaccinated and features four #FLUgitives whom everyone might know – or may even relate to themselves. (source)

Check out the mocking video campaign below for your recommended daily allowance of offensive and insulting propaganda.

The Fitness Fanatic

Convinced that exercise and all-protein diet is the key to staying healthy, this gym rat dreads getting the flu vaccine because nothing can get in the way of his workout. Putting his beloved biceps on the back burner is not an option. With big protection and a tiny needle, the Fluzone Intradermal vaccine only goes skin deep so no one has to mess with “lightening” and “thunder” unless they really have to.

The Turbo Mom

A modern day Superwoman, this suburban warrior balances caring for her kids, husband, home and pets on top of a busy job. But her hectic schedule leaves little time for anything else. Fluzone Intradermal vaccine is right on top of that – it’s a simple and quick way to get the protection she needs without missing a beat.

The Latest and Greatest Guy

A self-proclaimed gadget loving playboy, this FLUgitive always wants the newest version of everything.

He should ask about Fluzone Intradermal vaccine – it’s a smart, fast and efficient technology, just like his gadgets.

The Scaredy Cat

This constant worrier is on edge about pretty much everything.

But since his fear of getting sick outweighs his fear of getting a flu shot, Fluzone Intradermal vaccine is right up his alley. It uses a next-generation device to quickly help deliver vaccine just under the skin’s surface, so he can find something else to worry about for a change.

There’s even a dubious little app that allows you to load your photo and see how bad you will look if you don’t get your flu shot. No, I’m not kidding.

Notably, one type of FLUgitive is not represented in the videos – those of us who avoid the shot because we know better. Do your research and make your decision – don’t base it on biased propaganda presented by those who profit from the vaccine.